SORRY SORRY EVERYTHING IS SOLD. THANK YOU SO MUCH YOU WONDERFUL GENEROUS PEOPLE. YOU ARE AMAZING. OMG.
Hello. If you would like to buy a copy of a signed book from me now is, well, a time you can do that.
Normally I don’t sell signed copies of my work because the publishers give me the books for free (so it feels wrong to then try to flog them on), international postage is expensive, and also I have no idea what would be a fair price.
However, I have some spare copies of my books sitting around my house, and I would like to sign them for you, and sell them to you, and donate the money to COVID relief in India.
Why COVID Relief in India?
I think the answer to that is self-evident.
Which charity will be you be donating to?
I will be donating directly to Action Aid’s COVID Response in India. It’s a fully registered UK-based charity that works with women and girls living in poverty across the world. Their COVID relief efforts include delivering food supplies, distributing essentials like soap and water, funding women’s shelters and combating the spread of misinformation with awareness-raising projects like local radio broadcasts.
And if I donate before the 4th June (which I fully intend to) the UK Government will match my donation. Yay.
What are you offering and how much is it?
I am offering:
- a limited selection of personalised, signed books at $20 / £15 (or equivalent currency) per book
- an even more limited selection of completely unique signed and fully annotated copies at $250 / £180 (or equivalent currency) per book
I’m afraid will need to ask for a contribution towards postage: international postage, tracked and signed, for something weighing about as much as a book comes to about £15 worldwide and £10 to UK/Europe. A contribution of $20 for worldwide and £10 UK/Europe would be very much appreciated. And I will also make sure the book is prettily packaged in one of my lovely purple envelopes.
Is this kind of expensive?
Yes, which is why I normally don’t sell books. But it’s for charity. And also entirely optional.
Why didn’t you use an auction site or something?
Because auctions make me uncomfortable. Obviously all sales come down who has money going spare but at least this way it’s the same amount of money for everyone.
If you want to pay more than the listed price (on the understanding that the money will go straight to Action Aid) we can discuss that in privately.
How is this going to work?
There’s some Google forms below where you can sign up for your preferred book. The forms will shut down automatically if the number of available copies is met so if the form won’t work for you that means I’m already sold out.
My assistant Mary will then contact you to arrange payment, including an estimated shipping cost. Once the payment comes through, I’ll package up and post the book. Mary will make sure you have the tracking number so we can do our best to stop the book doing astray and a copy of the postage receipt so you know we didn’t fleece you.
If I accidentally over-charge you on postage, I will pay you back.
How do I know you’re not just going to run off with my money?
Mary will send you proof of the final donation by email and I’ll post it on social media, along with an itemised reckoning, so there’s a public record.
How long will this all take?
I will post the signed copies as soon as possible – within a week of getting this organised. In terms of the annotated edition I will need some time to, y’know, annotate the books. So those will be dispatched to you within a month. But Mary and I will stay in touch so you know I haven’t just randomly forgotten or something.
SHOW ME THE BOOKS BABY
5 x signed and personalised copies of Boyfriend Material: https://forms.gle/a8HxyjzHT5vyiDjA9ALL SOLD 5 x signed and personalised copies of Fire & Water: https://forms.gle/CmtFQvcfm6nY7Uk2AALL SOLD 5 x signed and personalities copies of The Affair of the Mysterious Letter: https://forms.gle/ReXkMeENCQdBnWZw7ALL SOLD 2 x signed and personalised copies of Liberty & Other Stories: https://forms.gle/Frog5YVCyfrVjxoq6ALL SOLD 6 x signed and personalised copies of the lucky dip (includes, chosen at random, either How to Blow It With A Billionaire, a first edition no longer available of Iron & Velvet, Waiting for the Flood, For Real or Pansies: https://forms.gle/fFavsLXUcaNa5uqo9ALL SOLD 1 x unique, annotated copy of Boyfriend Material: https://forms.gle/sVmj7aajQQ5pb43K8SOLD 1 x unique annotated copy of Waiting for the Flood: https://forms.gle/WBTCF28GkMjqhwXg7SOLD 1 x unique annotated copy of How to Belong with a Billionaire: https://forms.gle/PR4R8cHGLi8x2yP4ASOLD